Letters to Santa

A friend emailed me these letters to Santa. I got a chuckle out of them, so I'm passing the chuckles onto you.


Dear Santa
I wud like a kool toy space rainjur fer Xmas. Iv ben
a gud boy all yeer yer Frend, BiLLy

Dear Billy,
Nice spelling. You're on your way to a career in lawn
care. How about I send you a friggin' book so you
can learn to read and write? I'm giving your older
brother the space ranger. At least HE can spell!
Santa


Dearest Santa,
We don't have a chimney in our house, how do you get
into our home?
Love, Marky

Mark,
First, stop calling yourself "Marky", that's why you're
getting your ass whipped at school. Second, you don't
live in a house, you live in a low-rent apartment
complex. Third, I get inside your pad just like the
boogeyman does, through your bedroom window.
Sweet Dreams, Santa